Advice From The Mothers of Elektra to The Moms Juggling it All

They sacrifice their sleep, they wrangle chewed gum out of our hair, they endure door slammings and eye rolls, and for more moms than ever, they do it while navigating the rollercoaster that is menopause. To the moms out there juggling it all—career, hormone changes, motherhood, caring for aging parents—we see you, and we salute you.

In honor of Mother’s Day this year, we asked the moms of Elektra to share advice they wish they’d received with the superheroes out there making this world go ‘round.

1. Get the ‘me time’ in the books

“I try to schedule one night per week where I’m off the hook for dinner/bath/bedtime for my kids and my partner does it all solo. I try to use those precious couple of hours to do a yoga class, get a manicure, or see a friend.” – Jannine, mother of two, both aged 4

“I have “me time” once a week.” Pizza is ordered for everyone and I pamper myself with deep conditioning, nails, and face masks while listening to some music by myself.” – Romina, mother of two, ages 18 and 14

2. Find an accountability buddy

“Now that I don’t have to drop off my kids at school, I meet up with a friend at least one morning a week and we go to the gym. We do our cardio separately and then chit chat as we do a strength training routine. It’s not “fun” or pampering, but the pressure of not letting each other down has worked to get us there, and we enjoy each other’s company so it ends up filling my cup socially as well.” – Grace, mother of two, ages 14 and 12

3. Give yourself grace

“You don’t have to be perfect. Nobody can really “do it all.” Have the same grace for yourself as you would a friend or family member.” – Kara, mother of four, ages 14, 12, 9 and 5

4. Don’t take the eye rolls personally

“I remind myself daily not to take the eye rolls and loud sighs personally. And on days when it’s hard to take my own advice, I create space for myself and announce that I am having an early night, tell my husband “tag, you’re it,” and get into bed with a book or TV show that I can get lost in and I don’t emerge until morning.” – Alissa, mother of three, ages 17, 15, and 11

5. Give yourself permission to say no

“As a working mom, I also prioritize family time. While I enjoy my job and also remain committed to early morning “me time” for exercise, my evenings and weekends are for spending time with my family: sports, dance and music events, family dinners and activities together. I spend a lot of time working so I do not let myself feel bad for saying no to certain events in order to spend time with my family. The kids grow up so quickly and we are all busy, but the memories we make when we are together are priceless.” – Lindsay, mother of two, ages 12 and 9

6. Remember that your parents survived

“I’m at the parenting stage where my son and I are separated geographically across the country because of college and other life circumstances. Now I worry about boy things like accidents and poor decision-making that a 19-year-old boy can have. I remind myself that I’ve raised a healthy and mature son and that a lot of this is out of my control at this point. I remember back to my own youth when I did plenty of wild and crazy things and I survived it (and so did my parents). It helps cut off the worrying and anxiety at the moment.” – Beth, mother of one, aged 19

7. Don’t be afraid to say ‘sorry’

“It’s ok to apologize. Motherhood doesn’t transform us into super-humans, capable of managing life with abundant patience and perpetual calm. We still lose our cool – even more so during peri/menopause – and that’s ok. I don’t hold back on telling my kids that I love them (I say it a lot) and I don’t hold back on apologizing when I screw up (not infrequently). I see my kids as distinct individuals, each with their own strengths and vulnerabilities. I think they deserve to see me that way, too. Not just a mom but a human.” – Nora, mother of 3, ages 19, 16, and 13

8. Know that you can create change for yourself

“As I’ve gotten older, I’m better able to recognize and appreciate the wisdom I’ve gained from all of the experiences I’ve had throughout my life–as a parent, doctor, (former) wife, friend, and citizen of the world. I found myself at an uncomfortable standstill around age 47 (with hormones changing and COVID raging) and had to take stock. Some of the ways I had been spending my time and energy were no longer working for me. My adolescent kids needed me less than they did when they were little, so I had some time to focus on myself and what I wanted my future to look like.

I have consciously made AND unwittingly experienced major changes since then, some of them very difficult. Now at age 52, I am calmer, more flexible, and optimistic about my future, despite the swirling chaos of our world. So, if you are feeling overwhelmed and powerless, please recognize that it is within you to create change for yourself and to feel better!” – Laurel Edmundson, mother of two, ages 18 and 16